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Joke of the Day
"[meeting the parents] Do you have one in blonde?"
Next Joke
"Two muffins are sitting in an oven one muffin looks at the other and says ""Man its hot in here"" the other muffin looks back ans says ""Holy Shit a talking Muffin"""
"When someone tells me, ""Great question."" I never hear their answer because I'm busy congratulating myself for asking such a great question."
"I can't decide whether to buy a bicycle or a cow for my farm. Well wouldn't you look silly riding a cow? I'd look a darn sight sillier trying to milk a bicycle!"
"Why are dogs in a lot of pain? Because they chew balls."
"DON'T TELL ME THAT PLANTS MAKING THEIR OWN FOOD ISNT AMAZING. THATS LIKE YOU GOING TO TACO BELL BUT THE TACOS WERE INSIDE YOU THE WHOLE TIME"
"Why did the Reddit cross the line?"
"what You Call That 'THING'. After two hours of row, some big oaths,search of your wallet,mobile phone checking,and negative comments you can not make one 'THING' satisfied and thats called 'WIFE'."
"Why doesn't Smokey the Bear have sex with his wife? Because whenever She gets hot, he hits her with a shovel."
"Feed a fish to a man, and you have fed him for a day. Feed a man to a fish, and you have appeased Dagon. You have done well. we crawl we rise"