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Joke of the Day

"Would u watch a movie about a teenage boy who screams ""I wish I was dead,"" but God hears ""Deb,"" so he turns into his 50-yr old neighbor Deb?"

"What do you call a Filipino contortionist? A Manila folder"

"A skeleton walks into a bar and says ""I'll have a drink and a mop"""

"A large robot animal attacked The Home Depot on Friday. Shoppers were frightened at the sight of the Stihl Behr."

"I recently got a job in the fast food industry, changed my name to Fedora Everyone tips fedora!"

"What if balloons take over and start twisting us into animal shapes?"

"Donald Trump calls on Hillary to shut down her foundation. Meanwhile, we're all still begging him to choose a more natural color for his."

"What do you call a truthful piece of paper? Fax."

"I was thinking about getting a tattoo... [one liner] I was going to get a tattoo of a cross on my testicles, but I thought it would be too sacrilegious."

"thank god 50 shades of grey got the R rating they wanted because what kid under 18 wouldn't want to watch 50 shades of grey with a parent"