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Joke of the Day

"Why can you never trust someone that needs to go to the toilet? Because they're full of shit"

"Let's get a thread of jokes that are funny to hear, but don't work if you read them I'll start: What do you call a fish with no eyes? fsh!"

"A tank and a snake are having a heated argument when the snake says ""Shut up! You got penis on your face!"" to which the tank replies ""You got face on your penis!"""

"How many lesbians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one, except she scissors it in."

"Q: What do you call that great feeling of satisfaction you get when you finish your homework? A: The aftermath."

"What did the Bra say to the Hat? You go on ahead while i give these two a lift."

"I think I promised to have 3 beers and be home by 10 Sorry honey, I always get those 2 mixed up."

"Q: If two people had a race and one had sand in his shoe but the other did not, who would win? A: The one with sand in his shoe -- if it was quicksand."

"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Unless that beholder is your mom cause we all know that doesn't count."

"This club sucks & tell the DJ to lighten up on the Enigma. SON, YOU PASSED OUT. THIS IS A CATHEDRAL"