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Joke of the Day
"""I don't have time for this shit!"" I thought, as I sat on the toilet, angry, and late for work."
Next Joke
"What do you call a Christian who visits shrines? A roamin' Catholic."
"Tuba Player: Did you hear my last recital? Friend: I hope so."
"What's better than winning a Silver Medal at the Paralympics? Not being disabled."
"damn demi, your rap battle opponent didn't even try to diss your clothes. what's your secret. [camera pans out to show all-orange outfit]"
"Hand a baby a fork and he looks like a young Poseidon."
"As soon as they heard the flush, my phone interview took a drastic turn."
"Frederick Fox, hatmaker for the British Royalty, died today. He was one in a milliner."
"I don't want to tell you how to run your company, Hostess, but liquidating just as weed becomes legal seems like a bad business decision."
"My father always said to me ""son it's always best to fight fire with fire""... and that is probably why he was kicked out of the fire service"