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Joke of the Day
"What do nerdy mermaids wear? Algae-bras"
Next Joke
"A Jew with an erection walks face first into a wall... He breaks his nose."
"You're nice, cute & single? Can you introduce me to your friend who looks like he'd never return my texts? Yeah the one with the girlfriend."
"Cottonballs is a great example of something I would buy but not want as a nickname. Cinnamon buns, however... Credit Dymitri Martin."
"Woman hits me with her shopping cart. I apologize. Another woman hits me with her cart. I apologize. Being Canadian is like being married."
"If you get engaged and you and your partner both owns dogs do the dogs become brother and sister or are they married too?"
"With the terror and all the negative things going on in the world today, it's remarkable that Charlie Sheen is able to stay positive."
"What did the first stop light say to the second stop light? Don't look I'm changing"
"When Chipotle says, ""Guacamole is $1.50 extra, is that ok?"" I pause, then say, ""Hang on, let me call my financial advisor."""
"Why can't you fool an abortion? It wasn't born yesterday."