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Joke of the Day

"What if your pillow could collect your dreams and when you wake up you plug it into your computer and watch them over again..."

"Why are men are like public toilets? The good ones are taken, the rest are full of shit."

"Policeman: Why were you driving around in circles and laughing? Motorist: I thought I was on a merry-go-round."

"Historical fact: The term ""bro"" originated over a hundred million years ago and was short for brontosaurus."

"70% of writing is writ"

"Jealously is something you're good at when you suck at everything else."

"Hard to believe the Cubs last won the World Series 108 years ago. Most of them don't look a day over 30."

"How do you know the Japanese mass murderer was a chef? He spent his day cutting up vegetables"

"Why did the smart phone eat a lot? It had a big APPetite"

"My buddy says he is the world's worst at self-deprecating humor. he worried once he was too modest. Then realized he was wrong."