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Joke of the Day
"I used to know a joke about Jonestown... but the punchline's too long."
Next Joke
"What happened to Mr. Chin after all 10 of his children disappeared? He developed a ten Chin deficit disorder."
"My milk of magnesia brings all the boys to the yard and they're like, you sounded younger on the phone."
"If you ask me to go get ""Eyetalian"" food with you, our friendship is probably over."
"Gonna take up smoking, just in case I have to give an anonymous tip from the shadows at some point."
"My redneck cousin is looking for a girl into multiple partners. I told him that was ridiculously cliche... I mean really. Cracker wants a poly?"
"Doctor is rummaging through his bag looking for a pen... He pulls out a rectal thermometer instead, ""Ah goddammit some asshole has my pen!"""
"What is it? It has legs, but doesn't walk, beak, but it doesn't bite and wings, but it doesn't fly. What is it? -A dead crow"
"[first date] HER: I'm really into guys with ambitions ME: *trying to impress her* that's perfect, I have two frogs"
"Grandpa: ""My joints are stiff."" Me: ""Don't roll them so tight."""