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Joke of the Day

"A guy came up to me in the gym. ""How the hell did you get a body like that?"" he asked. ""Thanks,"" I said, ""That's very flattering."" He said, ""Not really mate."""

"[hears wife approaching while I read son bedtime story] the prince hugged the dragon..[hears wife walk away] ok, basically a retweet is whe"

"The most epic stage name for a Chinese porn actor would be Mao ""The Dong"""

"Dams. The only thing that holds back liquid better... Is the idea of using a port-a-potty. ""Look, I know my pants are brownening and getting wet, but I'll just wait forever -- I CANNOT go in there."""

"Who was the blind horse jealous of? The seahorse."

"Why is six afraid of seven? seven eight nine. (seven ate nine)"

"What is a Mexicans closing sales pitch? Kay-so-deal-a?"

"If a woman has fallen an idiot will walk by, a gentleman will help her to get up, but a real man will lie down with her."

"What was the last thing that went through JFK Jr's mind when his plane crashed? The console. What was JFK Jr's wife drinking when the plane crashed? Ocean Spray."

"I have no idea where all these trebuchet jokes came from then it hit me from 300 meters away."