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Joke of the Day
"Giving me a Milkbone after sex does not make it doggy style"
Next Joke
"Sorry I was cleaning my phone screen and accidentally took 37 selfies."
"Whenever I tinker with the idea of a having a relationship, I go spend a night with my married friends."
"I saw a boat with a sign that said ""For Sale"" so I added an ""ing"" to the end. Fucking idiots are lucky I came along."
"2 cats smoke catnip and lay around, discussing Plato's Allegory of the Cave. ""What if the laser pointer is just a projection?"""
"Why does the ""forever alone"" keep a beehive next to his bed? Because royal jelly comes in handy... you know, for lowering cholesterol."
"When do you know you are getting a good deal on a boat? When there's a sail on it."
"Once Prince dies there will be some freaky shit that comes out like he ate only butterflies or bathed in babies or something. Mark.My.Words."
"*you open a ring box and inside it is an enormous pair of jeans* He went to Jared"
"It's hard to do stuff because, you know, internet."