83869

Joke of the Day

"Did you ever hear about the Bass player whose timing was so bad he threw himself behind a train?"

"At what time does Sean Connery like to watch the Williams sisters play? Tennish."

"How many feminist does it take to change a lightbulb? Haha, don't be silly. Feminists can't change anything!"

"What's the one movie Rick won't ever let you borrow? He won't ever give you *Up*. No? I'll show myself out . . ."

"Friend at the pub says: if they ever make a film on Oscar Pistorius, it shouldn't be called 'Bladerunner', it should be called.... Taking the Pisstorius."

"So Jesus walks into a hotel... Jesus walks into a hotel and hands the receptionist 3 nails. He asks the receptionist, 'Could you put me up for the night?'"

"Canada is so sexist! Why isn't there a Womanitoba"

"Dead fly When you kill a fly, does it become a dead flew?"

"Whats big, pink, long and my girlfriend hates when I put it in her mouth? Our miscarriage."

"Protein in my laundry If you captured it all you'd be able to fuel a Chi Psi chapter right before a lacrosse tournament."