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Joke of the Day

"I told my GF that I'm jealous of her V-J. She shows me NO pity, though. She just rubs it in my face"

"There's nothing worse than getting bullied in school... Especially if you are a fish."

"What did Harry Potter say when he fell down the hill? ""Ouch! I Hermione!"""

"Did you know most baking companies are family owned & operated... they're all in bread!"

"How do you say ""Fuck you"" in American Sign Language? Lift your hand up and put all fingers down except your middle finger."

"""Hey, checkout my butthole."" - Cats."

"What would you have if your car's motor was in flames? A fire engine."

"What do Osama Bin Laden and a salmon have in common? It's a great life until they run into a seal."

"[NSFW] What do male pornstars and miners have in common? They both specialise in drilling 'ores."

"People ask me where I see myself in 5 years. I don't know. I don't have 2020 vision."