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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a bag of cocaine and a small child? Eric Clapton would never let a small bag of cocaine fall out of a window."

"Sea jokes aren't for little kids. They're too salty."

"Honked & did thumbs-up to teen goth girl on the street I thought looked super cool & she rolled her eyes & I was like YES EXACTLY KEEP AT IT"

"Tried to make jokes on this plane about the other passengers' carryon bags, but they went over their heads"

"I do not encourage eating cats. But judging by the amount of time they spend licking themselves, I bet they are probably pretty damn tasty."

"What happens when Turkeys get the common cold? They quit smoking."

"I don't watch World Cup soccer. If I wanted to see grown men struggle to score for 90 minutes I'd go to a bar."

"What do you call a boxing match between two aardvarks? A snout bout!"

"What's today's date? 10-4 Good Buddy!"

"STEP UP? Ive got a step ladder,I never really knew my real ladder"