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Joke of the Day
"I've been happily married for four years out of a total of 10."
Next Joke
"Explain joke what do cows eat? le-moo-ns"
"Poor Hillary Clinton... I haven't seen someone hit a glass ceiling this hard since Goose from Top Gun"
"How do you know if your neighbor voted for Trump? They've got a big burning ""t"" in their yard."
"I just broke up with my girlfriend who had a lazy eye. Turns out she was seeing someone on the side."
"Why did the mom cry as her baby Richard became older? Her little Dick was growing."
"How to take selfies: Step 1: Take 40 pictures. Step 2: Post the least bad one."
"Why were the ducks arrested? They were selling quack in the park."
"[Obama giving Trump the White House tour] O: and here's the toaster, it tends to stick so don't be afraid to jam a fork in to get it workin"
"I've decided to teach postcolonial theory instead of seventeenth-century poetry. Because, you know, easier Said than Donne."