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Joke of the Day

"Why do women have boobs? So ya got something to look at when yah talkin' to em'! So ya got something to look at when yah talkin' to em'! So ya got... Thanks Family Guy."

"1 Bitcoin = 19.62 USD. What does it say about your economy when imaginary internet money is worth more than your ""Real World Money""?"

"How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? Don't be stupid, feminists can't change anything!"

"A beggar once asked me, ""Any change?"" I said, ""Nope. You're still broke."""

"If the only tool you have is a dildo, everything looks like its ready to nail."

"Why was Karl Marx arrested for brewing a cup of Earl Grey? Because all proper tea is theft."

"[Date] Me: tell me about yourself Her: I'm really vegan Me: oh no Her: and I have a kid Me: oh no Her: his name is Kale Me: ohhh noo"

"I thought I'd just discovered a mass grave for snowmen Turns out it was just a field of carrots"

"Me: Table for one, please. Waiter: Would you like to see the men-- Me: YES."

"Apparently ""mowing the lawn"" means two completely different things to my wife and I"