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Joke of the Day

"So much negative, Wars, terrorism, climate disruption, political corruption.......Kardashians........ At least Charlie Sheen is positive."

"What's a martini's favorite garnish? Olive 'em!"

"Does anyone have a good joke about essays/paper writing I can use?"

"What did the bean say to the other bean? How have you been?"

"I got a pet hyena because someone has to laugh at my tweets..."

"Whats a cab drivers favorite song? Livin' on a fare!"

"Can I have a broken drum for Christmas? The best thing you could have asked for. You can't beat it!"

"How do you kill a circus? Go for the juggler..."

"I bet there would be a lot more wars if there weren't boobs. I haven't seen a boob in 2 days and I'm ready to kill someone."

"Social Life Status: My friends are balloons with faces drawn on them. Stuart. My best friend. Popped two days ago."