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Joke of the Day

"""outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend"" ""inside of a dog, its too dark to read""-Groucho Marx"

"What is the difference between a dead hooker and spare tire? I only have one spare tire in my trunk!"

"Can I have your picture so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?"

"Why did the architect take so long to get started on his church blueprints? He couldn't decide what font to use."

"""You're what you eat"" So when will your mum become me?"

"You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. You also miss 100% of the shots you do take because you suck at basketball."

"going to do everything the Nyquil bottle tells me not to"

"Confusius says Whaaat?!"

"2 Muslims walk into a bar. The bar explodes."

"What do you find in an empty nose? Fingerprints."