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Joke of the Day

"[music club] what should we play today [hand goes up] yes joe? ""banjo"" all those who wanna ban joe raise their hand [everyones hand goes up]"

"""conference"" comes from the Latin ""con"" meaning ""together with"" and ""ference"" meaning ""the worst people on earth"""

"How many Buddhists does it take to change a lightbulb? None, change comes from within."

"Got kicked out of the grocery store. Apparently yelling ""LET THE BEETS DROP!"" And throwing them at the ground is not acceptable."

"Me: Forgive me father I have sinned Priest: Get out of my house M: But it's a big sin P: *sigh* Speak child M: I broke into your house"

"My dad almost caught me watching midget porn. Thankfully I put my finger on the screen in time."

"An unemployed engineer gets lost while going to a job interview at the navy base Woops, wrong sub."

"""I can't eat all of that!"" ... and other lies I tell"

"What's the difference between Batman and a black man? Batman can go to a store without robbin'."

"Whats blue and doesn't weigh much? Light Blue."