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Joke of the Day

"What do soy beans and dildos have in common? They are both meat substitutes!"

"Today's menu: 1 gallon of attitude, 3 cups of sarcasm, 2 tbsp of leave me the hell alone, and a generous cup of shut the f*ck up!"

"Someone hash-tagged ""share the love,"" and I read it as ""shave the love."" I thought, yeah, I can get on board with that."

"A grenade isin't the only thing i'd catch for you bby. :^)"

"What has 16 balls and 3 pubic hairs? A sleepover at Michael Jacksons house"

"When Pavlov was done with his experiments what did he do with his dogs? Donate them to the salivation army ^^I'llseemyselfout"

"I'm going to hell for this but..... *knock knock* Who's there? *9/11* 9/11 who? *you said you'd never forget*"

"What rhymes with ""hug me""? Chutney."

"Q. What creature has the best aptitude for engineering ? A. The spider -- It has its own website."

"Can we have a moment of silence for all the great tweets that never make it out of the shower..."