81502

Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker? A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again!"

"My girlfriend feels she needs 72 half-empty bottles of stuff in her shower & if I even look at them, they all throw themselves on the floor"

"What do you get when you take Viagra with an iron supplement? an erection that points north."

"Procrastination Some times I procrastinate so badly on one item of home work that I do other homework to get out of doing that one item"

"Pugs. Because you can't own E.T."

"Q: What do you call a parrot that flew away? A: A polygon!"

"A girl Unfollowed Me !!! A girl unfollowed me wen i replied ""nice one"" to her tweet.I guess i should have said ""nice two"". ;)"

"I have the perfect body of a 21 year old female... It's in a freezer in my basement"

"My waiter asked, ""would you like sour cream, bacon and chives on your potato?"" ""That's a loaded question."""

"While seen my x-ray, my doctor said.... You know, when I was a child my dad use to tell me ""A picture is worth a thousand words"" But this one just say ""You're screwed"""