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Joke of the Day

"Why is Canada the part of the Illuminati? Because they have 3 ehs in the name. C-eh-N-eh-D-eh"

"Did you hear about the girl that went fishing with the three guys? She came back with a red snapper."

"There's no time capsule quite like the pocket of a coat that's been in the closet for a year."

"We call our new maid Non Sequitur. She's Latin and she doesn't follow."

"What's the difference between a woman and a video game? I don't get an erection when I beat a video game."

"I do not need to have a threesome... ... if I want to disappoint two people at once, I go to dinner with my parents."

"Imagine a shark eating pizza. Imagine you were frog. Imagine a donkey wearing a skirt. Imagine someone telling you to imagine stupid things."

"What do you call a group of ISIS members with their backs turned? A bunch of sissies."

"On a scale of 1-10 how obsessed with Harry Potter are you? About 9 3/4"

"what do you call a rock group with no bassist, drummer, singer or guitarist? Mount Rushmore"