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Joke of the Day

"I love drinking wine. It's my Riesling for being."

"What do you call a black guy flying a plane? a pilot, you racist."

"Tonight playing poker with a buddy he said ""Care to make this interesting?"" And I said ""Sure. For years I've been secretly in love with you"""

"What happened to the Mexican after he took heroin for the third time? He over*dos*'d ^^^^I'll ^^^^see ^^^^myself ^^^^out"

"Crossfit is the healthiest way to get rid of your friends."

"My stepladder is so great, I'm almost glad my ladders got divorced."

"Why did the boy call 911 when his father ran a red light? He didn't want to go home early and do his homework!"

"Indie-Tarts: the nuanced alternative to Pop-Tarts."

"You know it's a really good bar when there's a couple outside breaking up."

"Me: Dude, back off. You're totally scaring away all the hot guys checking me out at the gym. H: You do realize I'm your husband, right?"