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Joke of the Day

"Want to hear a joke about paper pizza? Nevermind, it's tearribly cheesy."

"I have a little joke that always makes women laugh My penis"

"I just saw a can of ginger ale that wasn't on an airplane and it looked really uncomfortable."

"What happens to male anarchists as they get older? They go from having anti-state issues to having prostate issues."

"So my daughters friend came over the other day and they played house together Now I have $50k in medical bills and she thinks she has Lupus."

"If being a disappointment were an Olympic sport.... I could win the gold, have my father present the medal to me, and it still wouldn't be enough for him to be proud of me."

"I always draw track marks on my arms and cough a lot when visiting family so that no one asks me to hold their baby or help prepare food."

"My neighborhood barber just got arrested for selling drugs... I've been his customer for 6 years. I had no idea he was a barber!"

"Back in my day, you didn't even know who was calling you when your phone rang. Shit was scary."

"How do you get a stoner to comprehend what you're saying? Put it bluntly."