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Joke of the Day
"I only listen to Australian indie pop music on Sundays.. Because that is the Lorde's day."
Next Joke
"What is a creationist's favorite button in pokemon? B to cancel evolution"
"Every time you reach under the couch for something a giant spider must choose whether or not to give up its secure location."
"What's the most sensitive protein? EMOglobin."
"Hilary Clinton goes to a psychic. The soothsayer tells her, ""Your husband will die a horrible violent death."" Hilary asks, ""Will I be acquitted?"""
"My friend really changed when she became a vegetarian... it's like I've never seen herbivore. edit: I think I summoned the pun cult."
"Good morning people.....I woke up feeling myself this morning....wait that doesn't sound right. What I meant is I woke up feeling confidant"
"Do you want to know that people care whether you're alive? Try missing a couple of payments."
"The Bible is 100% accurate. Especially when thrown at close range."
"Did you hear about the elderly seamstress with poor vision? She doesn't mend straight anymore."