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Joke of the Day

"""More than 1 way to skin a cat"" - ""Killing 2 birds with 1 stone"" - Running like a chicken with its head cut off"" -- who ARE we???"

"If I worked at Starbucks I'd pull a Napoleon Dynamite every time. ""I see you're drinking 2%, is that because you think you're fat?"""

"Why do they call camels 'ships of the desert'? Because they are full of Arab semen."

"I'm not looking for a TC, I'm looking for someone with a woodchipper who doesn't ask questions."

"When you turn on a light and the bulb burns out it's because you suck and that bulb would rather kill itself than hang out with you."

"Grandma's dementia has been really hard to deal with lately. And the worst of all is... ...She forgot about Dre."

"U2 are one of Ireland's most successful bands. Or according to their tax returns, one of Netherlands' least successful hardware store owners."

"Star Wars really beat me in movies.. Rogue One, Me Zero."

"Ew, I bet people who call people hipsters as an insult don't even have a favorite kombucha flavor"

"Shit.......I could get 100% on the test I got 27%. it was so close.."