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Joke of the Day

"Curiosity doesn't kill anything, stupidity does."

"Pinocchio was going down on his GF, she started yelling lie to me, lie to me. Pinocchio:"" i love you""!"

"God has no Phone, but I talk to him. He has no Facebook, but he is still my friend. He does not have a Twitter, but I still follow him."

"Everybody needs a bosom for a pillow Mines made of mammary foam"

"I have this Jewish friend. Hebrew beer for a living."

"A farmer spent over $12 million to see the effects of marijuana on cows... The steaks had never been higher."

"Q: What's red and really bad for your teeth? A: A brick."

"""Can we talk tomorrow?"" is my way of saying ""I'll try to do a better job of avoiding you tomorrow?"""

"Sneaky? Dude, I got two handfuls of soup into a movie theater once."

"Guy: you've been a bad girl. Girl: yes baby, punish me. Guy: OK. *burns all her shoes*."