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Joke of the Day

"A gambling addict begins his 5th stretch of therapy... ""It failed 4 times in a row, so it's bound to work this time."""

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"What do you get when you cross egg whites with a bomb? A boomerang"
"What's black and looks good on a lawyer? An unconvicted felon."
"Hello 911. ""He's back what do I do?"" Brent? ""Yes"" It's the just the mailman remember ""Ok, sorry."" Bye ""Wait, he put something in my mailbo"
"Barista: Can I get a name? Me: Free [Later] Barista: I've got a caramel macchiato for Free *fights break out as I smile from the corner*"
"Yo mama is like an Arcade Machine ... put the quarters in the Pussy and play with the titties"
"I saw these two blind guys about to fight and I shouted, ""My money's on the one with the knife."" You should have seen how fast they both ran off."
"If your wife is Q: If your wife is shouting at the front door and your dog is barking at the back door, who do you let in first? A: The dog, of course. At least he'll shut up after you let him in."
"Werner Heisenberg just unveiled a new car... It comes with a GPS or a speedometer, but not both."
"How fast are black people allowed to go on the highway? 25 to Life."