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Joke of the Day

"6 year old wouldn't drink out of my cup because she doesn't want my ""DNA"". Should I tell her?"

"What's red and orange and looks good on hippies.... Fire."

"How does Geppetto exact his revenge on Monstro the Whale? Marry a net maker"

"A farmer planted a crop of puns They were home groan."

"Hey girl are your parents retarded? Because you're special."

"The Islamic State is hosting a music festival in Iraq. The first annual Allahpalooza is sure to go off with a bang."

"I've been yelling for years. Now I'm convinced. I'm definitely the only one here playing Marco Polo."

"Video games don't cause violence, they PREVENT it. Whenever I see a turtle now, I chuck it off the nearest cliff where it can't hurt anyone."

"Well, I've got to hand it to you. -Guy explaining how the baton works in a relay race."

"How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? You wave :)"