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Joke of the Day

"How do you catch a whale? You wait until last call and use a good pick up line."

"What is black and doesn't work? Decaffeinated coffee."

"My parents always said I was artistic. They were very modest, so they only ever whispered it to each other."

"well i was going to climb mount everest but this yelp review says theres a nude man at the summit swinging chains around and yelling ""fuck u"

"What's the most intelligent breakfast? A Stephen Fry-up."

"My wife...she says I can be a jerk some times I think it's nice of her to give me permission like that."

"*somehow manages to beep at you sarcastically*"

"Where do Crows hang out on a friday nght? At a crow bar."

"Born on February 29th of a leap year, I can't legally drink till I'm 84."

"What do you call a girl who stands in the middle of a tennis court? Annette."