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Joke of the Day

"The Republican Party has shown its support for the mentally ill by nominating Trump for President! Well, support for at least one of them. (here come the trolls and bots)"

"Sluggish (n): What slugs speak."

"The Human Genome Project had a breakthrough and isolated the genes that make someone homosexual. They are skinny genes."

"1995: one day the Internet will allow all people access to the full breadth of human knowledge. 2016: *watching cat videos*"

"[Deathbed Confession] I wish I'd listened to my girlfriend more often. Especially as I crossed the road after she yelled BUS."

"Please be patient...I'm fcuking things up as fast as I can."

"What did Mary say the first time she changed Jesus' diaper? Holy shit."

"If you want to find a needle in a haystack, burn the haystack."

"I'm into perpendicular lines. I'm a bisectual"

"Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one."