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Joke of the Day

"DEFINITION OF DIPLOMACY Q: What is the definition of diplomacy? A: The ability to tell a person to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the trip."

"It was just White Floyd until that one red sock got mixed in."

"What do you call a herpes pun? a play on warts"

"Walked in lecture hall mid-lecture and the professor yells ""CAN I HELP YOU?!"" ""No thanks, I'm just browsing."""

"im tired of chasing my dreams So I'll just get their number and catch up with them later"

"I'm not sure but I think the family from Honey Boo Boo is just a family of bears that were shaved down and shown how to shit indoors."

"I started two diet plans today Because one wasn't enough to fill my appetite."

"Hey guys, remember that one time, when Clinton was president and gas was a like a $1 a gallon and people had money and jobs and shit?"

"Nickelback jokes are the Nickelback of jokes."

"How many drummers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, they have machines for that these days"