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Joke of the Day

"I've been told I'm not ambitious enough... If only there was an Olympic sport for being a lazy bastard. That bronze medal would be mine."

"How can you tell a sex doll is Muslim ? It blows itself up."

"Why dont feminists go to indoor soccer games... Because, with the astroturf, there would be no place for them to graze."

"How do you teach a girl math? Subtract her clothes, divide her legs, give her a square root and watch her multiply."

"Hey girl, can I have a pizza? Pizza that ass."

"The Sun's probably Asian."

"Q: Why don't Deputy Fire Marshals look out the window in the morning? A: So they have something to do in the afternoon."

"I just saw a black guy driving a BMW and doing the speed limit. I'm following him until he pulls over b/c I know he has drugs in the car."

"I spilled spot eraser on my dog... Now he's gone."

"What does the baker turned counterfeiter say? ""I make my own dough"". My sister Katie came up with this one."