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Joke of the Day

"Who was the first to see a cow and think ""I wonder what will happen if I squeeze these dangly things and drink whatever comes out?"""

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"Hey girl, are you an empty refrigerator? Because you don't have to be running"
"My boss kept saying he's dating himself. I told him he could do better."
"How Can You Tell Your Girlfriend Is Getting Fat? She starts fitting into your wife's clothes."
"There's no point in using a big word, when an infinitesimally diminutive one will do."
"""97% of the world's population is homosexual."" - survey based on YouTube comments"
"Why didn't the leopard go on vacation? It couldn't find the right spot."
"Why is it so hard to find good posts on NSFW subreddits? Because every post is a sticky post."
"Lazy rule #35: If you spill some water, it will eventually dry."
"Monorail joke I love making jokes about monorails, they make the best one-liners!"