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Joke of the Day
"How do you ask someone if they're Vegan? You don't need to, they'll tell you"
Next Joke
"What do you call a cow with only legs on one side? Lean Beef."
"i'd tell a joke about a vampire but... it'll suck"
"That's Odd. I can't even."
"Jack is coming over. ""Jack from work or Jack and the..."" [a beanstalk comes up through the floor and crashes through the ceiling]"
"Why did the forgetful Mexican cross the road? To get to the other side... err, no it was to pick up the laundry... nope, to get groceries? I forget."
"Did you hear about Mr. Pizza's divorce? His wife got full crustody and half his dough."
"[NYE] ME: *wearing 2017 glasses* OPTOMETRIST: *rubbing his temples* Stephanie your eyesight may be bad but you really only need one pair"
"What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed? Oh sheeeeeettttt!"
"What do you call a deaf dinosaur? Anything you like - he can't hear you."