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Joke of the Day

"New years- the only day where its socially acceptable to drink this early"

Next Joke
 
"You are what you eat? *eats Natalie Portman*"
"Save your breath... You'll need it to blow up your date."
"Why was the pianist arrested? He was caught playing in A minor."
"Hey people that twitter says are ""similar to me"", where do people like us put our car keys?!?!?!"
"I couldn't remember what time the sun was set to rise this morning. But then it dawned on me."
"What kind of animal has an asshole directly in the middle off its back? A police horse"
"Those Weren't Raisinets: A Mouse Tale"
"Why didn't the grizzly wear any shoes? He wanted to go bear foot."
"What happens when clowns get divorced? They end up in a custardy battle."