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Joke of the Day
"Your inspirational tweets were so inspiring they inspired me to unfollow you."
Next Joke
"Why did Simba's dad die? Because he didn't Muv-fasta"
"What's black, white and red all over? Battleship Potemkin."
"Cop: So, I'm writing a ticket for driving alone in the car pool lane. Me: You're going to feel really stupid when you look in my trunk."
"I was having dinner with my folks when dad called me a son of a bitch. I said, ""Listen, I don't disagree--but she's sitting right THERE."""
"Did you hear about the idiot who invented the one-piece jigsaw puzzle?"
"What climate scientist does Disney follow on twitter? The rogue one"
"My parents said they liked my DNA strand model. I said, ""Thanks. It's a nice pair of genes."""
"Did your hear about the man with a broken left arm and broken left leg? Don't worry he's ""ALRIGHT"" now!"
"What's the difference between GOP voters and polar bears? Polar bears gather around the ice hole."