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Joke of the Day

"A text from my friend. she:myspacebarisnotworking.canyougivemeanalte rnative? me: what is ternative?"

"Passenger profiled on airplane flight for doing math. I want to know if the profiler is a blonde? Feminist? Liberal arts major?"

"How do you drive a Unitarian out of town? Burn a question mark on their front lawn."

"You know Santa came when.. There's more milk in the glass than when you left it."

"Why do girls like to have a dog? Because it suits their personality, a bitch."

"What does Bill Cosby put in his garden? Rapeseeds."

"So I just had sex for one dollar Talk about a real bang for your buck"

"What did the pirate say when he turned 80? Aye Matey"

"I miss you... then I eat something and it goes away..."

"Tomorrow I'm definitely going to start running, no matter how many days it takes!"