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Joke of the Day

"[at my funeral] *casket falls onto the floor* Mum: that's the quickest I've ever seen him move Dad: lol owned"

"What's another term for anal bleaching? Changing your ringtone"

"Parents w/ 1st kid: *Peels grape & slices it into 84 tiny pieces. Parents w/ 4th kid: *Gives kid knife & fork to cut their own steak."

"Men, of course we need you. Because, jars."

"There's a joke in this thread. It's you."

"A guy won the lottery and bought a lot of weed, His name was Jack. He became known as Jack-pot."

"Dude on tv just said, ""Where there's fat, there's flavor."" He was talking about food, but I took it as a compliment."

"How do you count cows? With a cowculator."

"Two blondes walk into a bar The first one says ""Don't worry, I didn't see it either""."

"Seasons Greetings by Mary Christmas"