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Joke of the Day

"Hallmark Card: ""I'm so miserable without you, it's almost like you're still here."""

"If the employees in your human resources department were all very into Aleutian sea birds. . . Around Christmas time, everyone would be sending HR Puffin Stuff."

"Shoutout to grandpa... That's the only way he can hear."

"Why don't girls go to.... Why don't girls go to the bathroom after having sex? Have you ever tried opening a grilled cheese sandwich?!"

"Touched by Jesus Great words to hear in church, not so great to hear in a Mexican prison."

"if you wake up.... If you wake up in the middle of the woods and your butt hurts would you tell anyone? No! Wanna go camping?"

"What do you call a street full of cheap hookers and a McDonald's? Quarter Pound Town."

"What do you call a gay Jamaican? A Pokemon."

"""Yo bro this horse is actin a little weird"" ""Dude thats my dog get off"" ""why is ur horse so small"" ""Its a DOG"" Why u pronouncing horse weird"

"Well if you didn't want me to fall in love with you, why did you tell me you had nachos?"