77085

Joke of the Day

"They say breaking a mirror is the worst because you get 7 years bad luck OH PLEASE!!! Try breaking a condom!"

"So a pimp is berating one of his girls nsfw ""You've got no tits and your cunt's too small"" ""Fuck you. Get off my back."""

"I started studying Tai Chi, so I wouldn't recommend getting in a slow-motion fight with me..."

"Colorblind people are wondering why everyone on Facebook is celebrating Fifty Shades of Grey"

"*has argument with husband* *brings up all the dumb shit he said in 2011* *adds ""Historian"" to bio*"

"""Pikachu, use astonish!"" *Leans into opponent's ear* ""Jet fuel can't melt steel beams."""

"I got an iPad from my chinese friend... I love homemade gifts!"

"''Have you heard my knock-knock joke?'' asked the blonde. ''No'' said the brunette. ''Okay'' said the blonde ''you start.''"

"How much does a rabbi charge for a circumcision? Nothing, he just keeps the tips."

"What do you call it when a Dinosaur can't perform in bed? A reptile dysfunction. Thank high me for that one."