7701

Joke of the Day

"Two gay guys are hanging out... Two gay guys are hanging out, and one says to the other, ""Hey, let's play hide and go seek! Loser gets fucked in the ass... I'll be behind the couch."""

"My wife told me that she isn't very happy with our sex life. A small part of me disagrees."

"What did the pilot who fail flying school did when he went home? Got high."

"Was going to make a joke about my paycheck... Turns out I have insufficient puns"

"If one drop of semen contains more life than a drop of blood, why don't vampires s*ck co*k? Oh wait, Twilight."

"Guy Who Invented Figurative Speech: I've got something that'll blow your minds. Townspeople: *fleeing in abject terror*"

"If you were stressed out yesterday Does that make you past tense?"

"Two candles wanted to get high... They lit up and got low instead. Happy 4/20!"

"My girlfriend says she'll break up with me if I don't give up writing I said, ""Sorry babe. Prose before hoes."""

"How do Chinese pick a name for their newborn? They kick a Can"