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Joke of the Day

"How do thieves kiss? They make out like bandits."

"Touch it gently, put two fingers inside, if it's wide use three fingers, make sure it's wet and rub up and down. Yep that's how you wash a cup."

"Why did (do?) cavemen drag their women by the hair? if the dragged them by their feet they'd fill up with mud."

"Why can't you fool an aborted baby? Because it wasn't born yesterday!"

"I'm getting an MRI tomorrow... to find out whether or not I'm claustrophobic."

"I tried smoking mushrooms today.. ..but the pizza sauce kept putting the lighter out."

"why did abe lincoln get released from prison? because he's in a cent"

"Wanna have a little fun? Go to Facebook and post ""Anyone know a good lawyer?"" Then sit back and watch the speculation run wild!"

"One of the wheelchair basketball team players has been tested positive for WD40 :("

"Which street fighter is the least amicable? The ryudest one!!"