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Joke of the Day

"A baby boy was born without eyelids. After the circumcision, the doctors used the foreskin to make eyelids. Now he's cockeyed."

"Have you seen the features on the next-gen iPhone? Just google 'Galaxy S4 reviews'."

"A woman went to the bar with a black eye. ""How'd ya get that?"" asked the bartender. ""From my husband,"" she replied. ""But I thought he was out of town?"" he asked. ""So did I!"" she said."

"What is Mr. T's favorite month? April, fools"

"An old married couple talk sex. Wife: What ever happened to our sex relations? Husband: I don't know, they don't even send Christmas cards anymore."

"Kesha got a lip tattoo that says, 'Suck It.' I'd suggest you 'Disinfect It,' 'Fumigate It,' or better yet, 'Avoid It.'"

"Why is the word ""clit"" so fun to say? It just rolls off the tongue."

"Girlfriend: Did you fix the dishwasher? Me: Yup *girlfriend opens dishwasher revealing a monkey covered in bubbles, holding a scrub brush*"

"Sometimes I like to repost my statuses that didn't get any ""Likes""... because they deserve a second chance too."

"A man walks into library & asks if they have any books on coincidences. The librarian says, ""As a matter of fact, this one's just arrived."""