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Joke of the Day
"How do you make a 4 year old girl cry twice? Wipe your bloody dick on her teddy bear."
Next Joke
"What do you call the angel in charge of hydroelectrics? A God dam engineer."
"[God & his assistant making giraffes] ASST: Say ""when"" once the neck is long enough, k? *God is on his iPhone not really paying attention*"
"Hey girl, are you a fire alarm? Cause you're fucking annoying."
"I'll bet you, like me, average the most ""uh""s per sentence when ordering at a fast food drive thru."
"Don't tell me about how you ""dressed up"" your baby for a special occasion. If you're wearing something you can shit in you aren't dressed up"
"What did the stamp say to the envelope? I'm stuck on you."
"I didn't think my doctor could fix my bowed legs. I stand corrected."
"Alien joke. I feel sorry for the aliens....that live in the third world country."
"My favourite two word joke. Dwarf (_)   ( _)>-   (_) Shortage   [By Jimmy Carr]"