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Joke of the Day
"what is green and has wheels? A frog, I lied about the wheels."
Next Joke
"[Pun] There's something about the sky... There was a man in an airplane and he had just over dosed on alcohol, one could say he really was HIGH -<>~<>- ^those are what I call 'pun glasses'"
"Why do bachelors like smart women? Because they're so rare."
"'gamer' & 'foodie' are bullshit labels because they suggest you are something b/c you passively enjoy something everyone passively enjoys"
"I like to sip a cup of coffee on a Sunday, grab a book and start worrying about Monday."
"My dog licked the crumbs out of my computer keyboard & earned an online college degree."
"Don't forget how much dust you're inhaling all the time everywhere."
"A tried to take a photo of the fog last night. I mist."
"What is the difference between a 5 and a 2? 3."
"i can guess how someone will die based on their clothes date: what about me? Hawaiian themed bathroom fire"