75298

Joke of the Day

"What do you call all of Trump's failed businesses arranged in a circle? Orange"

"Girls love it when guys: - are respectful - are handsome - eat watermelon really fast and spit out the seeds like a machine gun"

"A photographer and a mechanic have a child After two long days of searching for the perfect name, they name him Cam."

"If you open Pandora's Box you better at least buy her dinner."

"Wife: ok, you have free reign to decide on all household decisions today... Me: *too shocked to move or decide anything...*"

"Why couldn't the NSA do anything after the blizzard? Because they were Snowden."

"A horse walks into a bar... and the bartender says, ""Hey look everybody! Sarah Jessica Parker is in the house!"""

"Why did the hoover not make the football team? Because he sucked With love and sexy things from Jaques x"

"Nothing says ""I'm an American"" more than ordering a pizza online and tweeting about it and then hating soccer."

"Why is Neil Degrasse Tyson such a famous physicist?... On the day he was born he escaped a black hole...... and then he spent his life studying them."