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Joke of the Day

"Two Policemen Two police officers crash their car into a tree. After a moment of silence, one of them says, ""Wow, that's got to be the fastest we ever got to the accident site."""

"Computers are not intelligent. They only think they are."

"You gotta know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em, know when to walk away and know when to run - ORIGAMI not for everyone !"

"I signed a petition to end women's suffering yesterday. Oops. Sorry: autocorrect. *suffrage."

"Why were the early days of history called the dark ages? Because there were so many knights"

"Olympic Sailing results are in! Denmark have taken gold Finland have taken silver Somalia have taken a middle aged couple who were on a worldwide cruise"

"People think that in Africa we ride lions and elephants to work. That's ridiculous, we don't have jobs."

"Ben Carson: Health care is not a right. Trump: We're not gonna just let people die in the streets! Carson: Oh you're so hippocratical!"

"If the Powerball has taught me anything, it's how to turn $200 into $4."

"How's anal like your first car? (x-post from r/funny) You don't really want it, but your dad gives it to you anyways. (From Dark Humor on FB)"