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Joke of the Day

"Recently in my town there has been a lot of rain. A local church put this sign on the marquee: ""Tired of the rain?..."" ""... Come find the Son inside!"""

"Me: excuse me, but I can't taste the alcohol Clerk: all smoothies are non alcoholic here. Me: YOU SHOULDN'T CALL YOURSELF A BAR THEN!"

"What Does A Nazi Turkey Say? Goebbels, Goebbels, Goebbels"

"[first day as homicide detective] Cop: any signs of forced entry? Me: yeah, a bullet somehow forced its way through his face & into his head"

"What is a gay jew's favourite bank? Goldman Sach's"

"Whats so good about german cars? They get from Berlin to Warsaw in one tank"

"Why do you never see hippos hiding in trees? Because they are really good at it."

"A photon checks into a hotel... The bellhop asks him if he has any luggage and the photon replies ""No. I'm travelling light."""

"Hunters Two hunters are in the woods. One passes out, so the other calls 911. ""How may we assist you?"" ""I think my friend is dead."" ""Make sure he's dead."" *Bang* ""Done."""

"Pretty awesome how you can buy chocolates on February 13th and everyone assumes you have a girlfriend & not a grudge w/ your neighbor's dog."