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Joke of the Day

"What does a dog become after it 6 years old? Seven years old."

"What do you get when you cross a pig and a Christmas tree? a porcupine"

"Q: What can save a dying blonde? A: Hair transplants."

"WIFE:Someone's broken in ME *grabs baseball bat*Wait here [downstairs] PAL:Can't u just tell her u wanna play baseball M: Keep ur voice down"

"Bought a new vacuum cleaner.. ..it sucks more than my old one"

"Have you heard the joke about the kid who was deaf? neither has he"

"So embarrassed... ...thought sombody cute was staring at me so i stared back. But then i realized we were both just the negative space around a vase"

"Light a fire for a man and keep him warm for a day. Light a man on fire and keep him warm for the rest of his life."

"My mum fed me yeast and put me in the oven. Just how I was raised."

"I used to hang out with a guy who was covered in mushrooms. He was an all around fun guy."