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Joke of the Day

"How to make the World Cup more exciting: Refs are on stilts The ball screams when kicked Kissing is legal 1 player gets to use a car Snakes"

"Today I found out my roommate was pansexual... Needless to say I was pretty shocked when I woke up and found him in bed with all of our kitchenware."

"I bet the frankincense guy was all like, ""Let's put the three items in one gift basket and the basket can be from all of us."""

"I want to be a stand-up comedian... But I'm afraid I'll be laughed at."

"What's the difference between pizzas and vaginas...? ...Crust on a pizza is nice..."

"Why did Adele cross the road? To say hello from the other SSSIIIIIIDDDDDEEEE"

"cop: ""you kinda look like one that's all"" me: ""in no way am i a pirate"" cop: ""hmm, are you sure?"" parrot on my shoulder: ""did he stutter?"""

"Van Gogh's girlfriend.. Van Gogh's girlfriend was overwhelmed with emotion when he cut off his ear and gave it to her. She said, ""Oh my love, why did you do it?"" Van Gogh replied, ""pardon?"""

"What's the difference between a hippo and a zippo? One's a bit heavy, the others a little lighter."

"Is ""humpty dumpty"" another way of saying ""fuck and forget""?"