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Joke of the Day

"I was gonna tell a joke about a pizza but it was way too cheesy!"

"In life, we should all aim to be like Italian meatballs. Well seasoned and well rounded."

"I'm not lazy I chose to use my creative genius on mastering efficiency"

"Dentist: You don't have to floss all your teeth. Only the ones you wanna keep! *I start flossing his teeth* D: Um... Me: These are mine now"

"What does pizza delivery man and a gynecologist have in common? Both can smell it but can't eat it."

"What did the programmer say to the architect chick? Wanna come back to my homepage and check out my floor plan?"

"What does a Victoria's Secret Black Friday sale have in common with a girl about to get a spanking? Both have panties half-off."

"One day I'll make a cure for blindness. You'll see, you'll ALL see!"

"What happens when you throw one banana to two hungry Apes? A banana split!"

"When I see ads on TV with smiling, happy housewives using a new cleaning product, the only thing I want to buy are the meds they must be on."